43) Musings of my heart

I was sitting in my balcony one day,
A cool breeze was blowing away,
There was calm & quiet all around,
Except in my heart & mind.
There was so much unrest, so much strife,
So many questions, so much pain,
Many past memories made their way,
Some happy, some sad.
Feelings of separation, tore the heart,
Oh so many & so much had I lost.
Those friends who were once so close,
Those people like family who were adored,
Those souls who distanced themselves as times changed,
Those ties that were broken never to be bound again.
A few I lost forever, I still can't believe,
But death is a sad & harsh reality,
Some just went so far away,
I wish I could bring them close to me again.
Change is something that my heart constantly fears,
But attachments to people is what makes the pain so real,
The turmoil, the chaos makes me sad & lonely,
I just want to be surrounded by my friends & family.
I sat there numb, so many thoughts in my mind,
I wanted to so much, but couldn't get rid of the strife,
The cool breeze blew, valiant in its try,
But the painful fire in my heart refused to die.

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